Skip to main content

Progress.

I'm 6 weeks into training for 2 half marathons and a rather large cycling adventure in 2018. It's been tough, as expected, these first few weeks. I've been getting into the groove of training my body to be fit again while also working on my self talk. I'm drinking less. And eating more! My nights are early. And my mornings are filled with gorgeous sunrises!

Overall, it's been good. I've been proud because I haven't be able to do this or anything that requires much of a commitment for YEARS. After 3+ years of uncertainty and change and turmoil, I wasn't sure if I'd ever find steady feet again...

6 weeks ago, I couldn't run a mile straight without stopping and the thought of having to get up when it was still dark out made me want to punch myself in the face. Last Saturday morning I ran 2 miles straight on a treadmill after getting up at 6am in 18 degree weather. In some peoples' worlds, that isn't anything and I get that. However, it was a milestone for me that was a big deal and I celebrated it. Progress is progress, y'all.

The awesome feelings aren't always there, either. There have been workouts that feel awful. Moments where everything hurts and I'm not performing as I feel I should be. Then that nasty self talk starts to creep in. The, "you suck at this", "you're so slow", "there is no way you will be able to do this shit next year", thoughts start to creep in. Turns out, I'm a really big bitch to myself. It's hard to turn those thoughts around sometimes, but I do my best to focus on the fact that I'm out there and that I'm moving forward. That, I have a feeling, will continue to be the worst part of this process, but I'm working on it. More progress!

When things get really hard and start to hurt and when I don't want to get out of my warm bed in the morning, this picture pops up in my thoughts and all of a sudden, things aren't all that bad.



This process isn't easy physically or mentally, but I've got this guy to answer to come next August and I will not let him down.

 Thank you for pushing me forward, Noah. 

https://www.crowdrise.com/helen-and-noahs-big-cycling-adventure/fundraiser/helengardner
Labels:

Comments

  1. WakegoddessDecember 27, 2017 at 5:52 PM

    You are doing amazing!! Your commitment inspires me to get my workouts done daily!! Love, Your Coach!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HelenDecember 28, 2017 at 9:17 AM

      Thank you, thank you for your support through all of this!!!

      Delete

Post a Comment

Questions? Comments? Share away!

Buzz kill? Keep on moving!

Popular posts from this blog

Daughter.

When you're estranged from not one, but basically both parents, the heaviness of that can still be palpable. Most days, most weeks, and months even, it's fine. I've learned to navigate questions like, "Where do your parents live?" or the weird feeling in my gut when someone says, "Oh, my mom sent me this from this favorite place of mine." I've learned how to adjust to Mother's and Father's Days by staying off of social media and doing something that makes me happy like getting out into nature. Some of these times are better than others. Here's the thing: whether or not the choice to go no contact with the two people who were supposed to show you all the basis of love was good or not, is incredibly difficult. Because social media is what it is, yesterday was apparently "International Daughters Day". It didn't bother me so much yesterday, but this morning wasn't off to a great start and for some reason, I felt agitated. I ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Goodbye.

 “I don’t know if I should congratulate you or console you.” - Craig “How about both?” - Me This was a conversation in our kitchen earlier this week. After a year and a half of weekly therapy, I had my last session with my therapist Tuesday. Not because I was over it or because it wasn’t working or because he retired. Nope. Because we got to a place where we could both say I’ve got the tools I need to move on. I have to say that there is no timeline for therapy and every situation is unique. I moved on from intensive therapy with my therapist because that it was worked for ME. I am certainly no expert and I have a feeling this isn’t the end of my therapy forever, but I do know that my experience with the right person allowed me to heal in ways I literally never thought possible. And it gave me the experience of a healthy “goodbye”. I was never prepared for that, so when we set an end date (not-so-coincidentally my Nanna’s birthday), it was hard to process. No one talks ab...
Post a Comment
Read more

Bikes!

Twenty years ago this month, I moved to Georgia and got a job at a local bike shop. My long-term boyfriend from my early twenties was an avid cyclist and bike mechanic. He had gotten a job wrenching at a local shop, Bicycles Unlimited. I was 19 and looking for a retail job since, at that point, it was all I knew. The shop was owned by a family and they were welcoming to this young girl working there with ZERO experience. I started on the sales floor and moved on to inventory management. It was my first foray into the inner workings of small businesses. More importantly, this was my introduction to the bicycle industry which has been one of the most meaningful relationships I've ever had.  I'd say 75% of the people I know in my life can be credited to a bicycle. Whether it be through rides, shops, or sponsors... I have met some of the most inspiring and influential people because of a BIKE. Some of the most fulfilling experiences I've had have been on a bike or because of bi...
Post a Comment
Read more