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Tindering & Other Things a Girl's Learned After 8 Months of Dating

At this point, everyone has heard of Tinder and swiping right. I've used Tinder on more than one occasion to meet people. Some of you who are NOT in the dating world consider this a hook-up app and while that can be said for every single online dating site, I've actually had some decent dates come from Tinder. I won't go into those, though. They aren't nearly as entertaining. 

Tinder, like other sites, is full of some of the world's most disgusting and entertaining people you will ever come across. If you can sift through enough profiles and find someone to start an actual conversation with then, congratulations! You have pretty much just conquered the Mount Everest of dating. Seriously. The shit people put on these profiles to woo women is nuts...great for drinking games though!

Even after getting to the communication stage, things can go south quickly. And when I say "south" I mean dick pics. One of the best parts about said dick pics is not the dicks themselves (guys....stop it....they look like stillborn rabbits). Rather, it's the approach and logic behind sending said pic of dick. Some guys ask first, then send anyway. Others just send them with exactly zero warning (super fun when in a public place). Some just send a pic of their crotch as if they're presenting me with a present I get to unwrap. In EVERY case, they get shut down, at which point they act surprised, apologize and often times ask to resend. This is when I screen shot the pic, laugh with my friends and just block their number going dark on them. This is also known as ghosting.

What's "ghosting" you ask? This is when you and a guy are seemingly into each other, have gone on a few dates, have had a good time and then all of a sudden he stops responding to you. POOF! He's disappeared. Clearly he's dropped off the face of the earth or had a horrific accident in which his cell phone is in a ditch somewhere and he's desperately trying to contact you ASAP. Typically neither of the previous scenarios is ever true and the truth is that the guy just doesn't have the balls to tell you he isn't into you anymore. RUDE.
Now, there are times when ghosting can be a blessing (it's still rude, though). Like when the chemistry is very MEH and you have an alright time together, but it's clearly not going anywhere. You go on a few dates and when communication stops, no one is upset. It's clear neither of you was into it and there was no need for a dear John letter.  


My new favorite (when I say, "favorite" I mean NOT) term is cuffing. I've heard that this time of year is considered "cuffing season" when desperate, stage 5 clingers decide they absolutely cannot live without a partner through the holidays and find someone to get into a relationship with. If that's the basis of starting a relationship, everyone is screwed. Here's why I'm NOT going to be cuffed, or go cuffing or whatever this holiday season:

1. Saving money. I don't want to buy some new dude Christmas gifts just because we're together....I'd rather spend my money on myself. Like a new Tiffany's ring...OOH!
2. Avoiding awkward introductions. My friends know me well enough to know if, at this point, I'm bringing someone new around during the holidays something's up. While it's fun to discuss my dating life in depth with my closest friends, I'll pass on the funny looks and winks made when said dude I'm with isn't looking.

I am clearly no dating expert and for me dating sucks more often than not. Being single, however, does not suck at all and I'm thankful for it for many reasons. Mostly because I'm not tied down, I can have awkward encounters with all kinds of people and then turn around to share it all with you guys. You're welcome.


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