6 months ago today I arrived at almost 9,000 feet on top of a mountain in a snow storm in negative temps with a raging cold and a little bit of hanger (hungry/anger for those unaware). I was home and it felt nothing like it.
There wasn't much that was unexpected my first few days and weeks here: loneliness, altitude adjustment, lots of tears, SNOW, pure fear, more snow, gorgeous surroundings...
Between those early days in January and now I've gotten used to this new place and settled into a routine. I live in my first grown up apartment. I run a bike shop and that place fulfills me. I live 5 minutes from miles of gorgeous trails. I've enjoyed many a brewery mixed with a few hikes and a couple of bike rides. I've continued to do things that scare me...like going to breweries alone knowing no one and sticking out like a sore thumb. I've learned to bring a jacket everywhere I go and that what I thought was bi-polar weather in Georgia doesn't hold a candle to Colorado's bat shit weather patterns. I've even found a couple of friends.
There is still fear. There are still tears. There are still really dark moments of loneliness when I'd do anything to go back. There are still days when I question if this was the right move even though deep down I know I belong here. I miss my people...and if you're reading this, you're most likely one of them. (I mean, who the hell else reads this?!) The cards and calls and random texts and visits have kept me going. I'm not really sure what I'd do without them and the support because this, as predicted, has been hard. REALLY hard.
Mostly, the last 6 months between then and now have forced me to look at me. Another not unexpected consequence of moving away, but what it's shown me about myself and where I am in life HAS been. Healing takes time and that's no different with me, apparently. Turns out, I wasn't as OK as I thought, but life is nothing if you aren't constantly trying to make yourself better, right?
So here I am, living the dream in a beautiful place I'm lucky enough to call home...and it certainly feels much more like home than on that cold day 6 months ago. I love you, #coloRADo.
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Buzz kill? Keep on moving!